Route C: Rib Country

This is a slightly different route through the Midwest, staying on I-70 a little longer. The major point in its favor, for me, is that it goes through St. Louis and Kansas City. There are few things that I love as much as I love barbeque. No, this is not the barbeque I grew up with - I'm from Eastern NC, and I love pulled pork in a vinegar based sauce, accompanied by slaw and hush puppies, like nobody's business. But seriously, I don't care where you're from, if you eat meat, how could you not be into this?

This will not be a powerful lure for my vegan best friend. I have a feeling I'll just be dreaming of ribs and replacing them with steaks in Nebraska or Montana. In the meantime, here's the rest of the case for this path westward.

Route Option C: I-70, I-80, and I-84 - Rib Country

 

 States

Virginia, Maryland,  Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Missouri, Nebraska, Wyoming, Utah, Idaho, Oregon

Cities

Wheeling, Columbus, Indianapolis, St. Louis, Kansas City, Lincoln, Cheyenne, Laramie, Salt Lake City, Boise

Attractions

Pennsylvania is exactly the same as in Routes A and B. Things don't start to get interesting until... 

Ohio

Toy and Plastic Brick Museum (Bellair, OH) – world’s largest private collection of LEGO. I assume they can't call it the LEGO Museum because copyright.

Mudgett’s Monument to Ohio/Flea Market (Zanesville, OH) – A guy who makes headstones made an Ohio Monument and placed it next to his flea market. Reviews claim that it really captures the spirit of Ohio.

Hartman’s Rock Garden (Springfield, OH) – Tons of little buildings and things made out of rocks. The displays change regularly.

Foy’s Halloween Stores (Fairborn, OH) – cluster of Halloween stores (Adult costume shop, Kids costume shop, haunted house prop shop)

Big Twig Maze Sculpture Thing (Dayton, OH) – giant twig sculpture called “A Wiggle in Its Walk." You can walk all around and under it.

Foot Print Rock (Gettysburg, OH) – It’s a rock with a footprint in it. People who have stepped in it claim to have gone BACK IN TIME.

Indiana

World’s Largest Candle (Centerville, IN)

Gravity Hill (Mooresville, IN) – put your car in neutral and go BACKWARD, UP the hill

House of Bells (Cloverdale, IN) – “Bells fill the front yard -- but this place is much more than just bells. There are huge battleship chains, buckets that you can swing in, traps to catch 50-foot-tall bears, and Paul Bunyan's ax." I'm so glad someone is prepared to handle the 50 Foot Bear Invasion.

Illinois

World’s Largest Wind Chime (Casey, IL)

World’s Largest Cross (Effingham, IL)

Teepees, Buffalo, Pumpkin, and Souvenir Shop (St. Elmo, IL) – buffalo and pumpkin statues, and teepees, and a giant souvenir shop. Helloooooooo tourist trap!

Kaskaskia Dragon (Vandalia, IL) – metal dragon sculpture, breathes flame for quarters. Actual flames!

Missouri

Giant Concrete Turtle Park (St. Louis, MO) It's a park. With, um...giant concrete turtles. At least for once it's not fiberglass?

Dan’s Emerald Forest (Overland, MO) – miniature town hand-crafted by Dan

Ozarkland (Kingdom City, MO) – gift shop/tourist trap of 50s/60s kitsch and hillbilly souvenirs

Nostalgiaville USA (Kingdom City, MO) – another gift shop/parade of kitsch

City block of Giant Books (Kansas City, MO) - 22 book spines, 25 feet high, held in place by two glass elevator bookends. It's a parking garage.

Castle Northmoor (Kansas City, MO) – Giant stone tower built by a crazy person

Jesse James Home (St. Joseph, MO) – The house where Jesse James was shot and killed

Glore Psychiatric Museum (St. Joseph, MO) - Ribs might not be a strong lure for Kate, but this definitely would be.

Nebraska, Wyoming, Utah, and Idaho are all the same as in Route A.  

So there we have it. All the feasible options. I will now await feedback from my travel companions on which one they think is the best idea. Then comes the next part of the fun: finding the best food and bars along the way.